Jannie Balliett

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Poetry - Page Three

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("Alone" is the first poem I wrote  and dear to my heart)

Darkness envelopes the day
leaving me alone
inside my thoughts,
trapped to face the horror
and the emptiness
of myself.
Finding no one to blame
for the injustice
and the years that haunt me,
forced to face the consequences,
of my mistakes,
I weigh.
There is no escape,
as the truth reveals
the miscue of my existence,
within my thoughts,
darkness fades into light,
leaving me behind


Where light once shined,
bestowed by your essence,
empty is my soul
darkened by your absence.
Pain that you inflicted,
left torturing me forever,
will eternally remain
becoming my affliction.
You are gone,
but will always be,

 ~Eternal Despair~

Burrowed lines,
deeply etched upon
the face of despair,
illuminated by a flicker in the darkness
of past injustices,
exposes all desolation,
and hopelessness
within an empty heart,
tormented by the eonian emptiness
now past, so unfulfilled,
reflects in the mirror
of the saddened soul,
lost to fate's control.
Knowing what never can be,
finding no retribution,
no solace to free,
with only hope remaining
for the tears of agony
and sorrow,
be the unrelenting salvation,
for complete blindness to the pain,
extinguishing the light
to an eternal life,
... in the face of despair.


Sorrowful futileness of power and control,
endeavored feverishly in vain,
wrapped and disguised in purpose,
struggles for victorious conquest
over accusative affliction
born of a feeble mind within.
Lacking subtle boundaries
of reflective accretion,
rampantly despondent doubt,
overwhelms the essence of the soul.
With wicked assay of self-indulgence,
hidden inside as empowerment,
it can not banter the meaningful madman,
who foolishly searches for a gain
of power and control...

~I Struggle For My Own~

No longer a part of someone else's dream,
I struggle for my own.
Envisioned, and once shared,
now lay severed of completion,
as I am left alone,
inside my shattered thoughts.
Not finding revelation,
for it is all so unknown,
divided, I am now discovered,
left apart of the unity and revelation
once shared, a time of past.
...I struggle for my own.

~Beautiful Rose...Painful Thorn~

Remembering a time long ago past,
on Valentine's Day,
filled with the sweetest scent of roses,
floating gently in the air.
When red was our theme,
as was love within our hearts,
biding a satiated blissfulness,
you gave a single, red rose as a gift,
an expression of love,
a token of affection,
hidden within its center's essence,
lay a diamond ring,
sparkling its beauty,
of the love presented.
Then, soon became a painful thorn,
of a long ago bitter memory,
of a time past.


My world as I knew it,
lay fallen and shattered
among the isolation
that you selfishly inflicted.
And with the illusion,
that was once my reality,
my world as I knew it,
vanished into the air.

Like a breeze that blew by,
scattering the pieces,
leaving memories of you,
and the smell of your essence.

Every waking moment
is spent in despair,
from a world of fantasy,
that we once shared.

My world as I know now,
is not of yours,
forever cursed and darkened,
by the presence of your shadow.

Every sleeping moment,
that is kindly granted,
haunts me with promises
of your face, forever etched.

Now emptiness remains,
and a lonely path to journey,
outside the realm of peace,
hollow of your love

The shell of its making
that was left behind,
is a place of mere existence
in a world I know now...

 ~Lonely Road~

The road of faith we shared
of an unknown journey,
is left to change
without subtle warning.
The path we once walked,
was one of sharing
the journey together,
freely accepted, unconditionally.
Make some sense of
the faith that was betrayed,
for the path that lies ahead,
is a valley of hope lost.
A lonely passage followed,
to a place now obscure,
leads me quietly,
onto a lonesome road
of faith now lost
...to be forever unknown.

 ~And I Dance~

Your words were music to my ears,
full of sweet melodies composing my life,
and I danced ...

The rhythm,
swaying and seductive,
enticed me to listen to your every tune
and feel alive ...

Your song of rapturous beats,
bestowed inviting passion,
resounding within my soul,
full of melodies I needed to hear ...

Your music became louder,
lyrics, unbearable to my ears,
the beat more violent,
with rhythm, wildly frantic,
and, I stopped dancing ...

Now, I listen to a different song
of new meaning and melody,
of my own composure,
and I dance ...
again ...

With Love

by Christy L. Surginer

(written by my daughter)

Breath inhales as once before

Dreams of life and gifts of more

Love born so deep with eyes of blind

So begins one of a kind

Take my thoughts they lead the way

Hear my words what I must say

Your turn to see as if at night 

Time to go you mustn't fight 

Know yourself and never lie

Lessons learned but still you try

We live our lives one place in mind
Show me now what did you find

Questions asked though I am gone

Look inside a brand new dawn

Have love and faith the answers come 

Life is lived with love my son

 Copyright 2005 Christy L. Surginer

"Poetry is simply one's soul crying out."

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